Saturday, May 18, 2013

No really, it stinks.

I found myself thinking about Nik the other day, no particular reason, he just popped into my head the way people do from time to time.

Nik is that strange combination, a confirmed petrol head and hippy. He used to live with his mum, two brothers, sister and a selection of miscreants too numerous to name just up the road from me  (it was a big house).

I am reliably informed that he is presently in Oz building machines for the new(ish) Mad Max movie Fury Road. I tried Googling him to see of there was a link to works in progress and to see if I could tempt him with my brillint idea for a road warrior battle sequence (which I have subsequently forgotten), but the only reference I found was to his brother, Andy, on this Polish web site:


 It reads (approximate Google translation from the Polish) "Andy Smulion had a debt recovery service. He turned up in stinking rags so that those unable to stand its smell, without batting an eyelid, gave money."

Celebrated for a while in the tabloids in the 1980s, Andy was known as the Smelly Tramp Debt Collector. He would dress as a derelict (his general demeanour gave him a head start in this respect) and, accompanied by a vicious stink, visit the offices of the debtors where he would present a copy of the unpaid bill which (we were told) was usually paid PDQ provided he promised to get out. The stink was carried by a disgusting old tweed coat which had been dowsed in a home made concoction reportedly whipped up from 'the juice of rotten cheese, eggs and kippers', but were, I suspect, simply the more mature contents of his fridge. He kept this garment in the garage of the family house. When the wind was in the right direction we could smell the damn thing from our house - they could probably smell it in Poland.

I hadn't though about him and his niffy dunning activities for ages - funny old thing this Internet...

No comments:

Post a Comment